The Last Hoorah Golfing Society
Minutes of May Meeting
Date: 25 May 2005
Present: HO, PB, DA, NM
Venue: La Foret, Le Touquet
Berets
must be duly doffed to the Hon. Doctor for organising and transporting the
members on this memorable sortie (despite the fact that we were compelled to
congregate and be transported from the “non-negotiable” and inconvenient -
except to the Doctor - Hickstead Little Chef interchange; perhaps the Hon. Doctor has fond memories of
some anniversary soiree with Mrs Doctor at this venue?)
The
Doctor duly laid on some appropriate literature in the form of the Daily Sport,
and travel to La Belle France passed like clockwork and without further
incident, leaving time for a gentle warm up on the practice range at Le Touquet.
As
the members teed off from the 1st, the sun blazed down upon the inaugural
presentation of the President’s putter to the Hon. Sec in recognition of his
record third term in office as buffoon of the month, all captured digitally for
posterity. It is perhaps a pity that the Hon. Sec did not use said putter from
the tee-box, as his first drive hooked into the woods, and his game went into
swift decline thereafter.
DA
and HO went head to head initially before NM came into the fray, and at the
turn, the society witnessed its first three way tie (won on a countback by NM).
NM put his additional strokes (following his deliberate handicap trashing at
Piltdown) to good effect but was unable to keep ahead of DA, who following a
winner-takes-all put on the 17th, duly hoovered up the financial goodies on the
back nine and the overall win for the first time in society history.
After
a couple of swift panachés,
and after swelling the Doctor’s mobile golfing pro-shop with fine wines and
cheeses from Le Clerc, the party retired to Le Channel in Calais, to deliver
its lengthy post portem on the proceedings. This restaurant, handpicked by NM,
specialised in serving large quantities of bread with everything.
HO
put in an early challenge for the buffoon award by tipping the contents of his
hollandaise sauce into his lap, but gracefully declined the assistance of the
mademoiselle who offered (somewhat beyond the call of duty) to remove HO’s
trousers. NM (not to be out-done) put in a starter for ten by asking which of the
cheeses were pasteurised, before doing a clean sweep of the said cheeses.
Although DA later drove a rather circuitous route back to Le Chunnel, it was
felt that it would be grotesque to penalise such school boy errors on the back
of such a well-organised day, and after due consideration, it has been agreed
that NM must take over the mantle of buffoon-of-the-month by passing into
legend as Monsieur Du Six Fromages, and we look forward to him putting out on
the 18th at Hever on a date to be confirmed in June.
The
day was capped by numerous drunken renditions of “You’ll Never Walk Alone” as
Liverpool walked through the storm to take the European Cup. And so, as ever,
to the results ...
|
|
HO |
PB |
DA |
NM |
|
Front Nine (stableford) |
18 |
13 |
18 |
18 |
|
Back Nine (stableford) |
18 |
15 |
19 |
19 |
|
Overall (stableford) |
36 |
28 |
37 |
37 |
|
Gross score (18 holes) |
83 |
91 |
84 |
87 |
|
Gross score (5 par 3’s) |
+2 |
+3 |
+2 |
+3 |
|
Birdies |
0 |
1 |
0 |
0 |
The winners for the month were
therefore as follows:
Front Nine: NM 18 points (countback from HO and DA)
Back Nine: DA 19 points (countback from NM)
Overall: DA 37 points (countback from NM)
Par 3’s: DA +2 (5 holes) (countback from
HO)
Birdies: PB 1
Player
|
Playing
H/C
|
Exact H/C
|
Score Today
|
Adjustment
|
New H/C
|
|
HO |
12 |
11.8 |
+12 |
0 |
11.8 |
|
PB |
12 |
12.4 |
+20 |
+1,6 |
14.0 |
|
DA |
13 |
13.4 |
+13 |
0 |
13.4 |
|
NM |
17 |
16.7 |
+16 |
-.03 |
16.4 |
PB
still to re-arrange the missed February meeting and is due to arrange the June
meeting which he promises is likely to be at Hever.
p/w/lh/05
- minutes – may 2005